Reply to Two siblings forced the sale of our inherited beach house and I can't get over it

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]NP. 
OP is sentimental about the beach house. She's probably also disappointed that her 2 siblings didn't even want to discuss buying out the uncle together with her.
She said it all went pretty quickly. 
[b]Did all 3 siblings even take the time to discuss all the options available to them?[/b]

[/quote]

Siblings did not want to discuss what options were available, because they didn’t want to carry a second vacation home with their siblings, full stop. Commingling money with family is often a recipe for disaster, especially when you have multiple families involved. OP was already complaining on this thread about how her siblings would want to use the house (that they paid for, but whatever…)

If OP seriously (not a flight of fancy) wanted to buy it herself, I trust she could have made a deal with her uncle and father. [/quote]

It is a tricky dynamic for one sibling to just buy it all. [b]Then what, OP and her husband change the locks and ban the others from visiting after they’ve been going there for 40 years?[/b] It also could look greedy and bullying to the broader extended  family, as if one sibling is “big-shotting” the others.[/quote]

The other siblings did not want to be property owners of a property they were not using often.  Despite OP's rose color glasses view of the house, owning real estate costs money.  What did OP expect would happen when the roof needed to be repaired, when appliances broke, when there was a foundation problem?  I bet she expected that they would split the costs, so not only would the siblings have to contribute money towards buying the house from the uncle, but they would have been on the hook for maintaining the house.  Yes, they have similar incomes, but OP wanted to dictate not only how she and her husband handled their finances, but also how her siblings and their spouses committed their income.  If they wanted to take vacations to Europe or put their kids in private school instead of maintaining an aging vacation home, they are clearly just wrong and they kept her from retaining her nostalgic memories of her childhood.

But, if she decided it was important enough, she and her husband could have taken out a mortgage and bought out her siblings and they would be the sole owners.  How would it work if the siblings wanted to use the house?  The siblings could have paid rental like an airBnB to come and stay at what was now OP's vacation home.  Despite the number of people who post on DCUM about siblings who think they are entitled to use poster's vacation homes, there is no reason that you can't charge family to stay at your vacation property that costs you money to own and to keep up.  You can tell them they are getting a "family rate" to stay there and charge them less than you would charge someone else renting your house, but you charge them and tell them that the family rate helps defray the costs of keeping up the vacation property.

And it's not "big shotting" if the siblings were given a chance to buy in and chose not to and to force OP to pay out their portion of the property value.  In that case, once she has bought them out, they have no more claim on the property even if they have been going there for 40 years.  They sold out their claim and she's not bigshotting.  If anything, they owe her appreciation for keeping the property in the family when they didn't want to.  They can them pay her back when they want to visit the family vacation home because she's covering to keep it in the family.[/quote]

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