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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I think it's multifactorial.

My youngest is 16 and is anxious and depressed. He is not interested in social media at all but does spend too much time on video games. He is hyper aware of news- global warming, college admissions stats, war in ukraine, pandemic. I was pretty informed at 16 but in the 1980s you could get away from it more easily. So yes this is the phone effect, but not specifically social media.

This one and even older siblings also feel this inability to leave behind any mistake. Let me say how glad I am no cell phone cameras existed in the 1980s. Mistakes seem unrecoverable when they might be recorded forever online. They are hyper aware of this and afraid of risk taking of any kind. It is drilled in by schools as much as parents.

Pressure comes from schools also where test scores matter and teachers are graded on student performance. One of mine still has anxiety over timed tests, which started in FIRST GRADE FFS.  Teachers lay it on pretty thick sometimes- you better focus on this and get it right! next year you'll be in X Grade! OMG, middle school is not gonna be this easy,  high school, college, you'd better get prepared, blah blah. It's endless.

And school isn't the same either. There is a significant gap between my oldest and youngest and my youngest has way more small assignments that need to be submitted by photo or online through x app or whatever, in some ways it feels like more to keep track of for the same or less amount of content. There is less fixation on homework, which is good, but the automatization of a lot of it (not even talking distance learning here) makes for a lot MORE small requirements and less nuance in grading (when it's computer graded there's no partial credit, for example).

It's lots of things and some of it is parenting style but really its bigger than that I think.[/quote]

This is excellent. It captures what is going on with so many teens today. Your point about constantly emphasizing why you need to be hit over the head with every mistake and shortcoming from a young age at school to get you ready for the REAL WORLD resonates with me. It's no wonder young people are anxious about becoming a part of it.

Judgment on social media is another factor. I call it the "My Life is Ruined" syndrome. With the possibility of every mistake, every instance of bad judgment or even misspeaking being broadcast to the world, every interaction carries lifelong implications. The neverending chorus of internet judgers exists regardless of your own buy-in to social media. None of my kids are heavily into social media themselves, but that doesn't stop its potential intrusion into their lives. [/quote]

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