Reply to I finally set a boundary with in laws and they made me feel bad

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[quote=Anonymous]Op if your MIL makes any more snippy comments about your mental health comment a petty comeback could 'Thanks for your concern.  I hope you didn't have much anxiety with your drive due to arriving later'.  😉  I mean it amuses me that she is pushing to come earlier due to her anxiety at driving at night and yet you saying you need time to prepare for your mental health is put down by her.  However petty comebacks don't achieve much so perhaps think this to yourself rather than saying it.

It's ok you asked them to come later, it's ok you want to prepare in peace and in quiet without feeling like you need to take care of them and their comfort.  It would be distracting.

Your comment about being 'made to feel this way', no one can make you feel something, you simple feel it and you can change how you feel.  You control your feelings.

There is nothing wrong with you saying you are a little stressed out and need some time.  Likewise your MIL is silly because she is admitting to anxiety about driving at night, so she herself has stresses, anxiety, worries however whereas she feels it's ok for her, she is putting you down for it.  She has no empathy and is simply being rude because you put a boundary in place.  Ignore her.

When she arrives, if she makes any comments just rise above it.  I may be tempted to say how you had so much to do and if they were there you would have been distracted with wanting to make sure they felt comfortable and entertained so you appreciate the extra time you had to prepare ie show her niceness after her snippy comment will reflect her nastiness back to her.  [/quote]

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