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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Dear OP: It looks like you have this whole thing justified in your head already that you can invite everyone to go dutch. I think the majority of us think this is a big no-no. You really need to scale the celebration to something that you can afford. Why not get pizza delivered at your house? If you can not afford it, then you really should not plan it. Otherwise, you are basically asking everyone else to foot the bill for your husband's party. If you are really intent on having the others foot the bill to a party that you should be hosting, perhaps you can have your sister invite everyone:  "Let's all take Bob out for dinner at Benihanna's!!!". BTW, every 40th birthday party I have attended was hosted by the spouse/partner. Good Luck on this! You are going to need it![/quote]

No, what I've decided now (after reading this thread) is to either do 1) a brunch at my house, which would be low-key, 2) invite everyone to a pizza/bowling type place (though need to figure out what kind of places are in NoVA, I'm not that familiar with the area), and pay for everyone, or 3) do a dessert themed party at my house, from say 8 pm-11pm.  We have established that I will not invite people to a restaurant and expect them to pay.  That was my original thought, but apparently it is a social faux pas (which I didn't know).

My friends, as well as myself and DH, are very informal types who tend to have potluck dinners or mini golf outings to celebrate birthdays, so I think they would be happy with any of these options.  Though these are indeed new friends, some of whom don't know each other, so there is that to consider.  DH and I are newish to the area so we really want to celebrate this big birthday with our new friends, even though we don't have a "group"--only friends from different areas (work, volunteering, etc.).  So because of that fact not sure how well a party at our house would work.  Will have to think more about this.  I don't have much experience with entertaining (DH and I mainly host brunches, in which we make all the food, which have all been very nice and low key).  I've never hosted a party at home and so while it sounds like a fun idea I worry it will be too much work/stress.

I appreciate everyone's ideas, and now I know definitively that the restaurant idea was a bad idea.  Good thing I posted on here before sending out an e-vite!  Though honestly, my friends are so laid back and informal that I don't think they would have batted an eye at the dutch thing at a restaurant, since it was going to be an Olive Garden type restaurant anyway (i.e. relatively inexpensive).[/quote]

I like these ideas.  I also think because it is a group that doesn't know each other it's better to do something other than a sit down dinner.  As for board games etc. at a party at home, I'm more likely to play the wii games or karaoke than board games but part of that is the idea I don't want to do an activity that is too involved and would want to be able to drop in and out of activities as well as conversations.

Good luck.[/quote]

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