Reply to What’s the end game plan for a cheating husband?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]To the PPs, above, I am a man, and I admit I have all those traits women value - tall, attractive, outspoken, charming, professionally successful, etc. And I raised the issue of sexual rejection repeatedly for years, like a decade. I bought the books (come as you are, etc), [b]tried to articulate physical touch as my love language[/b]. I could give you 15 examples of being proactive and at least partially vulnerable with my wife.

And nothing changed. In fact, it got worse.

So my choices are: 1) remain faithful and miserable; 2) divorce and hurt the kids, our finances, social standing; or 3) find someone in a similar situation, stay married and sane and if I get caught, I am at worse where I would be with option 2.

tl;dr sometimes men do open up and still face rejection. Not all women who are cheated on are victims or blameless.[/quote]

lol all men say that physical touch is their love language. And yet their wives complain that they can't hug their husbands without being groped and begged for sex. Touch doesn't mean sex. [/quote]

If I hugged my partner and they groped and begged for sex, I would feel bad for having let them get to that point.[/quote]

Even if you were having sex regularly? There are women who literally cannot sit next to their husbands without being assaulted. [/quote]

True! My husband grabs my ass and gets a hard on any time I’m near.  If I walk by in yoga pants or I have bare legs, etc.  We have been married 23 years.  He gets a hard on if the wind blows.  If I’m in the shower there is head poking around the curtain.  [/quote]

This is my point. So many men say "touch is my love language", and they mean only sexual touch. Which means that their partners cannot hug them, cuddle with them, or even touch their arm as they walk by. How do you think that would make a woman feel? [/quote]

Desired?[/quote]

It would make her feel objectified and like her body isn't her own. A woman doesn't want her entire existence to be like walking alone through a crowded market in Cairo. It's exhausting and dehumanizing. [/quote]

+1000000
I love touching and being affectionate.
I used to love sex with my husband multiple times a day. 
His entitled attitude that he was the husband and I had no right to say No even concerning my own body——ruined my desire for him.
His entitled attitude bled into other areas and he raged at me and then escalated into physical abuse.
He’s been in solo therapy for a few years now. 
Yeah, all “MY fault” for his affair. [/quote]

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