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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]
I think it’s weird to focus so much on the other woman. She has moved on with her life. In the grand scheme of things, her affair will barely be a footnote in her story. Don’t let it take up any more chapters of yours. [/quote]

As a former OW who still ruminates on this 10 years later, you could not be more wrong. I think every day about what I did to his wife, how it ruined both of our integrity, and how it has alienated me from deeper relationships bc to this day I have never told anyone, and anyone decent who heard it would be disgusted. I can never express my remorse to his wife bc I was selfish enough to want it at the time. It radically changed my self image. I try to do more things that are better for others now because I don't believe in an afterlife. If anything it is him who has moved on the most -- kept his marriage, assets and reputation and no one was the wiser outside of his marriage, in which he was discovered and has been forgiven. I meanwhile am wandering the earth like Cain. For all the betrayed wives out there, all I can tell you is that it's at best a growth experience and at worst life-ruining for the OW -- as so many novels will tell you.[/quote]

Stop ruminating, feeling guilty, and punishing yourself. That doesn’t help anyone. Everyone makes mistakes and this was yours. It’s ok for you to be happy now.[/quote]

+1. You’ve done your time.  Who cares if the guy seems like he got off Scott-free.  You never know, and in any event it’s out of your control.  You only have one life. The time to start living it is now.  [/quote]

The OW is always a used piece of toilet paper that gets flushed when he’s done and she becomes boring/old news and annoying over time.  The married dude always just gets on with life.  It’s the way of the world which is why women are dumb as sh@t to hook up married men and think he’s a great guy and it is some rare special love.  It’s an act.  It’s just sex until he decides yiu fave become boring or are getting too needy and becoming a risk. [/quote]

I'm just going to   say you are a troll  who gets off on calling women nasty names. Otherwse you need some psychological help.[/quote]

That poster speaks the truth.  Some of these desperados should see that’s what married men really thinking them.  [/quote]

What's true is that these "men" go back to women they know are doormats. It's not because he loved you, or realizes you are a high-value woman or mother, it's not because he's got issues and needs therapy or whatever other lies you have deluded yourself into believing.  He's selfish and you are a convenient doormat,  he doesn't have to spend money on a divorce or child support, he still gets a maid, cook and babysitter to run his life, and probably sex too and he know he can sleep with anyone he wants on the side and  his wife won't say a thing.

What's true is if he really loved you and respected you he wouldn't have stepped out in the first place.[/quote]

If he respected you, he would have taken you outside of the bedroom, or at least out in public.

If he loved you, he would have left his wife.

If you were high value, you would be able to get a single guy instead of having to stay in the shadows as a tawdry side piece.[/quote]

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