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[quote=Anonymous]I'm in a similar situation with my 13 year old son with serious ADHD and processing issues.

His father and I went to competitive colleges and grad school and worked in NYC for investment banks and consulting firms. We worked our tails off but we were able to achieve what we wanted with hard work.

We assumed we'd have the same path for our child (meaning they'd be successful and hard-working - not that our child would do what we did).

It's a tough thing. I sometimes think I'll open a business  so that my now 13 year old can have a job he can't be fired from. My husband has his own company but the work is too highly skilled (math and science specifically).

But in the process of building our house recently, I realized that not one person other than the architect and engineer had much education, common sense or intelligence.

This is not a construction bashing thing - I know plenty of smart and qualified people but we unfortunately didn't get any of them to build our house.

My point is that these people do well with very little understanding of their jobs, poor social skills and no education.  I want more for my child and I think he can do more than these people so I'm already hopeful about that - my kid is more capable (and so is your daughter) than people who are making well over $100,000 doing very little work and not doing it well.

Also, your daughter, (and my son) have some emotional intelligence. I'm sure you are raising her to be a good person and she knows how to communicate. These skills are perfect for sales jobs.  Sales people are not always super smart. They are likeable and they learn what they need to learn.

I'm talking myself off a ledge right now because my son is having constant quarantine breakdowns and isn't doing any of his work.

Meds don't work for my child but they do for others. I'm hoping he will be better able to handle his ADHD as he matures. I just have to be hopeful.

I think we have the advantage of lots of tests for our kids. We zero in on what they are lacking. Nobody did that for our generation. We had lots of kids in our schools growing up who were a little slower and somehow they made it.

It's these new labels that are intended to be helpful but that can also cripple us with fear and make us think we are alone (we don't know a lot of successful people with these issues because they don't talk about it.)

Richard Branson has ADHD and he's done great.

Donald Trump has a long list of diagnosed and undiagnosed personality, intelligence and mood disorders and he's President. AND lots of people THINK he's qualified. So it's not just that he isn't smart - it's that he's fooled a lot of people.

Being smart isn't everything. My wise father always said, "It's better to be lucky than smart." Sometimes things work out better for some people than others. Let's hope our kids are the lucky ones.

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