Reply to SAHM: what do you do to protect yourself financially?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I will get flamed/argued with for this. I think it’s easy enough to tell after a few years of dating and a few years of marriage whether or not a man is an asshole, is controlling, is limiting access to money, etc. People don’t change overnight, despite all those who supposedly “never saw it coming!”

If I had any hint, any hint at all that my husband was financially or otherwise controlling, I’d never have stayed home. I would have stayed working and divorced.

But I’ve always had full control of the money, when I worked and when I didn’t. My husband is kind and selfless and just the best sort of person, and so is all of his family. He has never tried to exert control over me and always makes sure I feel comfortable with things.

Fast forward and now we’ve been together 20 years and married for 17. Even if he abruptly left me, half of all of our assets would be more than enough for me. Our two homes are almost paid off and college is fully funded, in addition to all of our other investments.[/quote]

I am willing to bet that you both also have a fulfilling sex life and are loving to each other within the marriage. [/quote]

Yes we do/are.[/quote]

Lady, you got lucky.  I say this as someone who also counts myself as lucky.  Holding up your own individual, lucky life story as a reason that no SAHM should think about the various contingencies life may send their way is the height of arrogance and ignorance.  To dismiss people who have not had such good fortune as "deserving it" makes me think you do not deserve your own luck.  [/quote]

I have been lucky in my marriage, and I think the arrogance of a lot of these posters is deeply off-putting. [/quote]

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