Reply to Regret having children

Forum Index » Eldercare

Reply to "Regret having children "

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I have a teenager. I regret having her almost every day. I got breast cancer when I carried her and I refused doctor's advice to have an abortion and treat the cancer. I work and have given my all for her. I need her to outgrow her selfishness. It has eaten a hole in my soul. Everything, all the time, every moment of everyday is about her...or she feels it is. 
I am exhausted and cannot wait for her to leave for college. Her Dad funds everything for her and does not allow her to have any consequences for her actions. 
So yes OP I do regret it. I wish I had put myself first.[/quote]

I’m sorry for your situation.  When my first was 18 months my DD started having Major health issues that no doctor could seem to diagnose or cure and a specialist at Hopkins told me “you really need to quit your job to take care of her, I’ve never seen such a young child so stressed in my career.”   So I did, although I was pregnant with my second and loved my career.  Three months later, just poof my daughter’s health issues just disappeared, no explanation.  And I couldn’t get my job back.  Or any job.  I looked for 5 years, and no one would hire me despite my experience and credentials.  My career was over, for nothing.

Now my DD is a teen and like yours it’s all about her 24/7. She’s rude, salty in the mouth, uncooperative, and just so hard.  She fights with me constantly.  It turns me into someone I can’t stand to me.  The arguing, the discipline, the exhaustion.  I feel like she took my career, my livelihood, for what?  Yes, I’ve beem to therapy over this.  No, I don’t tell her these feelings.  Yes, I love her.  But it kills me a little each day what could have been.  And she has no clue. 
[/quote]
Well, why not clue her in? I know people on this board are against showing any negative feelings to your kids, but I don’t know how else these kids are supposed to develop empathy. I am very upfront with my 5 yo and tell him when he is being selfish or unpleasant. During particularly bratty episodes I make him say “I am not the only one who needs something “. It seems to be working so far.[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics