Reply to Hosting step-grandson for two weeks- how to deal with food fussiness

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[quote=Anonymous]Op, you have two separate issues: introducing cultural food and pickiness. Separate them.

Re. introducing German food, make a few German things that are within his comfort zone. Most American kids like sweets and starches. So try spaetzle or strudel. Make pretzels together and see who can make the fanciest twists and shapes.

Re. pickiness, even if this were your job, it’s not going to get fixed in 2 weeks. Some picky kids grow out of it, others learn to live with it, but either way, it takes years.

After years of trying and hoping that my kid would be less picky, we finally decided to focus less on his food intake and more on his manners. This lesson can be delivered in a kind way. Don’t bark out house rules when he arrives! Instead, offer ways that he *can* react that are acceptable to you.

For ex., instead of pulling nasty looks or comments, we made sure DS had an arsenal of alternate replies in the event that someone interrogated him at the table. It’s less insulting to the cook if you say “It smells great, but I haven’t acquired a taste for chicken liver yet” (truth) or “I had a huge breakfast earlier and I’m not so hungry” (white lie) vs. ‘ugh, gross!” Then, the issue is you and not the quality of the preparation.

My DS didn’t get in trouble for not eating or trying things, he got in trouble for poor manners and reaction to food that he didn’t like. Eventually he outgrew some of his fussiness on his own. During that process, he was polite.

Remember to check *your* attitude too - if you’re going down this path, you need to deliver this with kindness and in the spirit of helping your young visitor, not castigating him.
Take him out to dinner, have him help you cook, teach him to make simple healthy things. Keep your meals balanced, but in component pieces. And remember to do fun things with him that don’t involve food![/quote]

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