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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]
Or you end up with a spouse who trashes your marriage and leaves you with the choice of breaking up your kids' home and finding some compassion and relief from the sadness and disappointment.

For years ive done everything I could to support my husband with his depression, watching him show extremely limited character by quitting jobs when he was "too depressed to work" without consulting me. I've never had the choice in all of this time not to keep on keeping on for our family -- even though the pain of having a husband think you're not worth the effort to man up and work is enough to make me want to stay in bed.

I've supported him through counseling, taught myself not to blow up about money or stress or having a filthy house when he's staying at home and we can't afford help. And I've watched the kids keep being close with him as he pulls away emotionally. They feel a lot of love. He's their normal. Our community is their normal.

I could break it all because my husband trashed every now and has no character (his therapists recommend he keep working when he's getting depressed but he gives up) or I could do what I'm doing - carve out a few hours per week to be held and loved by someone who sees my worth and has a normal sex drive.

I chose B. And then I go home and am a rock for the three people who depend on me.

It's not the life I wanted but it's what I have.[/quote]

I assume you are equally as supportive of a man who is at the breaking point with his wife unilaterally closing off the bedroom? Or is this affair option only something available to dissatisfied wives?[/quote]

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