Reply to <vent> Why does DH always think we'll have sex when he comes back from business trips?

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Reply to "<vent> Why does DH always think we'll have sex when he comes back from business trips?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Consider this a divergence of focus during the time he's away. When he's away, no, he's not thinking about laundry or daycare pick up and drop off. If he's traveling for work, he's probably thinking about work. On the way home, he has time to transition between his work mentality and an "excited to be home" mentality. You, on the other hand, do not have a transition. Your mentality is "children, grocery shopping, laundry, etc." and when he comes home, your "excited for him to be home" mentality is probably driven a lot by relief that he will be able to help you with some of the tasks you've been juggling.

I have been there. What I have done is asked DH to text me when he gets back into town (knowing that he will be home in 30-40 minutes depending on whether he's on the train or at DCA). When I get that text, I stop the domestic stuff to the extent possible and just relax. Set kids up with an activity of some kind that doesn't require a lot of supervision. Sit back and have a glass of wine or cup of tea. Freshen up a little. In my experience, when he gets home, I am no longer harried and feeling like I just need a break. We also table conversations about home logistics stuff until the following morning unless there's something that truly can't wait and just enjoy each other's company. Sometimes sex is involved, sometimes not, but the transitional period is really, really important.[/quote]
Excellent approach. It has become all about the kids. It it really needs to be spouse/relationship first, kids second. They will be gone in 18 years.[/quote]

Not really.  Kids are permanent, relationships can come and go.

The modern idea of marriage is much more as a partnership for raising a child correctly, and much less centered around romantic love.  And statistics show the switched focus, to being on the children, actually produces much better children- thereby securing your genetic future.  Thus, a much smarter choice. [/quote]

Jesus who messed you up? Why don't you go ahead and start a petition for a Gilead society? [/quote]

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