Reply to Why do children get MORE expensive as they get older?

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[quote=Anonymous]I love this particular DCUM question and followed it with great interest while my kids were in daycare.  Now that they are out, I have found the answer thus far is that it is much cheaper.  At the height of the daycare years, we were paying $2400/mo for 2 kids, which I realize is low.  Between aftercare and summer camps, the amount is closer to $12k per year.  I do believe we are in that "sweet spot" some posters have mentioned - kids are 7 and 9, so there hasn't been orthodontia yet and they are not majorly into any sports.  I would say expenses outside of child care are at most $200 more now a month than they were in daycare/preschool.  We did a modest amount of activities back then and they still do some now.  Clothes are marginally more expensive.  We've always traveled with them and those expenses haven't changed much (we've always wanted a suite - sleeping in the same room sucks!).

Having read so many of these threads now, I draw the following conclusions about those who say the years after daycare are more expensive -

1) They are including expenses that are not universal (like travel sports and horseback riding) or necessary to raising a child, but that they value enough to spend a lot of money on. Problem is that for comparison purposes, these expenses aren’t ones that all (or maybe even most) families will bear.  I live in Takoma Park, and while I’m sure there are kids involved in these more expensive activities, it doesn’t seem to be the norm.  So far, my kids are not interested enough in sports that I would try to justify this expense.  On the other hand, we have a hefty travel budget because it’s something I really enjoy and I want my kids to experience.  But neither of these expense categories is a necessary or universal expense of raising a kid. 
2) They are competitive and have a little keeping-up-with-the-Jones mentality.  Like the pp who doesn’t want to disadvantage her children by leaving them not knowing how to play golf.  Or the ones who will spend large amounts on test and college prep to get into a selective college.  These expenses are kid-related, but they may not jibe with your personal child-rearing philosophy.
3) They include expenses that aren’t day-to-day care expenses (which is usually what the daycare crowd is comparing to when they ask about post-daycare finances).  For example, including college savings.  Just because you start to save more for college after you’re done with daycare doesn’t mean that the child is more expensive – just means you didn’t have the cashflow to fully save and pay for daycare at the same time.

I think it’s 100% doable to spend less after daycare than during, but that many families don’t. For those families that spend more after daycare, it’s because they want to give their kid as many “advantages” as possible.  But that doesn’t make those greater costs a foregone conclusion.
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