Reply to Physically heterosexual but male entitlement has ruined it for me

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I totally identify OP. And before I get called horrible names my life has been nothing but men who were nothing but shitty to me.

1) my "father" was an alcoholic who could not be a parent in any way, financial, emotional, protective.  He pretty much left when I was 11 and I only saw him once since then.

1) early 20's meet a guy who is my first real love.  He is in the [b]military, law degree[/b], very loving and attentive.  We start a really awesome relationship and then one day, all of a sudden, his wife and kid show up (he was deployed when I met him).

After him I had a lot of trust issues, did some pretty self destructive shit.

3) early 30's meet a guy who I saw myself with for the rest of my life. He was feeling the same.  He comes from a [b]good family, highly educated, great job[/b], very loving.  Until we accidentally get pregnant. Then all hell broke loose.

I am not saying I didn't play a part but I just don't see how trying again would get me any better than what I had so far.  I'm fine being single.[/quote]

I think it's telling that you put "military & law degree" and "good family, highly educated, and great job" before "loving & attentive." The other stuff is nice, but it's the loyalty, love, and affection that should be your primary focus when looking for a significant other. I wonder if you're making some mistakes because you're looking for the father figure you never had.

[/quote]

That was only to point out that I wasn't seeking out losers with no education or prospects just because " i fell in love."  Of course "loving and attentive" was the priority.  But I don't see how anything I did would have prompted a man to flat out lie for two years about being married and having a family.  But I can imagine that my dad leaving and not being in my life probably affected me and contributed to how I experienced these men.[/quote]

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