Reply to Should I just wait 18 or so years to live how I really want?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Are you going to leave your child too? Selfish (as you say you are) doesn't end with your husband.[/quote]

No I could never leave him. I don't enjoy being a mother but I love him and am bonded to him. My love for him is instinctive but I find the rote tasks of caring for him completely exhausting and utterly joyless. In no way did motherhood complete me as a person or make me feel more whole. It stripped me of my identity as I struggle to work and take care of this tiny human. It's a weird contradiction bc I love him so much. It's hard to explain. [/quote]

This is really normal, although thinking about blowing up your marriage over it might be a sign that you need some therapy.  Changing diapers and cleaning up messes is not fun.  Caring for a two-year-old may not be all that hard, but its relentless.  And for most of us, no matter how much we love our kids, cutting up grapes and cleaning up vomit and dealing with tantrums is not especially fulfilling.  I never expected motherhood to complete me as a person or make me feel whole.  If anything, motherhood changes who you are as a person, and that can be a really hard adjustment.   [/quote]

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