Reply to Should I just wait 18 or so years to live how I really want?

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Reply to "Should I just wait 18 or so years to live how I really want?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Are you going to leave your child too? Selfish (as you say you are) doesn't end with your husband.[/quote]

No I could never leave him. I don't enjoy being a mother but I love him and am bonded to him. My love for him is instinctive but I find the rote tasks of caring for him completely exhausting and utterly joyless. In no way did motherhood complete me as a person or make me feel more whole. It stripped me of my identity as I struggle to work and take care of this tiny human. It's a weird contradiction bc I love him so much. It's hard to explain. [/quote]

Little secret for you - the BS about motherhood 'completing you' is just that. It's hard, exhausting, often joyless work, especially when your kids are young. My marriage was difficult during that time too.

So what you are is completely normal. [/quote]

I beg your pardon, I never promised you a rose garden...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2-eclUz-RYI

OP, if you bought the hype about "completion" through dirty diapers and exhaustion, and you can't let it go, get yourself a therapist ASAP.  Your expectations are not realistic and that is interfering with your ability to just do what needs to get done.

As for your husband, we all have good and bad years. Anyone who tells you otherwise is either lying or in denial.

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