Reply to Did anyone build an in law suite or move to bigger house to move in MIL?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Considering this for MIL, age 70.  She is healthy now but lives in an isolated cold-weather area and DHs only sibling is very unstable.  She is not wealthy enough to live  on her own here  We have two children who love her and could benefit from her care (ages 4 and 6) after school.  This is my idea, not DHs.  Is it crazy to consider?  I come from a culture where this is not uncommon.[/quote]
This the kind of mistake you will look back on with tears in your eyes. Americans don't know how to behave themselves and contribute to a family the way people from traditional cultures do. This kind of arrangement will not work with an American MIL. She will move in and be ungrateful.[/quote]

What a dumb thing to say.  My grandmother lived with us when she got older.  She had her own bedroom/sitting room/tv area.  The hardest thing was that she really wanted to help, and she worried that she wasn't useful, and sometimes her efforts to be helpful actually made things harder for my mom, but she certainly wasn't ungrateful, and my brother and I appreciated her presence.  We were older, so we didn't really need babysitting, but it was nice to have someone home when we got home from school, etc.  I'd say the key things are to make sure that she has her own space and privacy, and some regular part of the family chores/routine.  Eventually, she had to move to an assisted living facility because she required more care than we could give, but it was a wonderful time while it lasted.  [/quote]

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