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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Is there any truth to what she says? I really don't know how people can cut off a blood relative.  My sister doesn't seem to give me much thought.  She always has an excuse for why she has to get off the phone or why she can't visit.  Yet she has never told me if I've done anything wrong.  I've come to the conclusion that I shouldn't invest my emotional energy in people that don't care about me.  I need to think of people as how they really are and not how I wish they were.[/quote]

There's tremendous truth to what OP's sister said. She posts threads here every few weeks/months about how her sister won't do what she says or how her sister took offense to her criticizing her for eating a salad or whatever. OP tries to control her and can't leave her alone or respect any boundaries the sister tries to set up. Then she's surprised when the sister wants to wash her hands of her. This thread wasn't posted to try to learn how to respect the sister's wishes, it was to get ideas of how to make her do as OP says. Every thread OP posts is full of about 6-10 pages of people telling her to leave her poor sister alone, and maybe 5 people with control issues saying OP doesn't seem that bad. Then someone links the past threads, and 2 or three of those people read the history and say that now they see more of the story and agree OP needs to back off. That's why people suggested therapy.

OP clearly loves her sister, but it's the cloying kind of love that suffocates a person, not the kind of love that lifts you up. I feel sorry for the OP that she can't see that and isn't wiling to change, but she absolutely brought this on herself and continues to try to justify her actions. Now it seems to be spreading out and affecting her other relationships, including her DH. I sincerely hope she checks herself before it ruins that relationship, and I hope she doesn't rule her children if/when she has them with the same heavy hand she tried to rule her sister with. [/quote]

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