Reply to 1st grader turning down birthday party invites

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I don't know if this is it for your DS but my DS's anxiety started to rear it's head in 1st grade.  He was well liked at school, liked playdates but [b]started to avoid birthday parties and other events where there were larger groups of kids.[/b]  He also wasn't able to articulate why he didn't want to go.  Instead of asking him whether he wanted to go, I told him 'we' were going.  He'd ask me if I were staying and I'd say that I wouldn't leave unless he were comfortable. I also gave the hosting mom a heads up.  Never had an issue from a host and he outgrew that particular fear by 3rd grade.  Now, he does have some other anxiety issues but no longer turns down invitations.[/quote]

My Ker is like this.  She has been anxious in large groups--particularly entering a room full of kids or being the center of attention--since age 2.  Luckily now it's pretty mild, but I sometimes try not to get to bday parties, group lessons, etc. late partially for this reason (sometimes she freezes for a sec if the room is packed with kids and they're all paying attention to her when she gets there late).

Not sure if what's going on with OP's kid is necessarily anxiety, but worth probing more to figure out what it could be.[/quote]

This was one of the first signs of my DS's anxiety as well. Forcing it usually caused a big scene, and later when we realized what an anxious kid he was and how hard events like that were for him, we felt terrible. Birthday parties can be noisy and full of the unpredictable. Does he show any other signs of being anxious?[/quote]

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