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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]It always seems sad to me that the physical process of birth devolves into some tug of war about control in so. Any families. I'm so sorry you're going through this, OP.

Birth is not a community activity in our culture. The ONLY things you have to worry about is you and yoour baby, and getting through this as safely and comfortably as you can. I'm sorry that you MIL is "hurt", but her hurt feelings have nothing to do with you, or the safety and comfort you experience during labor. So, if you're not comfortable with her there, then the answer is no.

It grates on me that so many people infer themselves into relationships of equivalency when it comes to this kind of thing. Most human beings are closer with their own parents than their in-laws - so it stands to reason that you feel safer and more comfortable with your mother there.

But doesn't your DH have a say? Nope. He is solely there for your safety and comfort too. If something happens to him that he can't make it that day - the show will go on. So, while his preferences should be taken into account and worked around if possible, they aren't final vote.

If y U want to be kind, you could invite MIL afterwards to the birthing center, but that seems moot seeing as you plan to go home right away. I don't understand her meeed to see you in the recovery phase of labor and birth anyway. Would it really not be more enjoyable to see you in the comfort of your home, when you are settled and ready for visitors?

I'm not a women get carte Blanche because they're the pregnant ones person often, but when it comes to this stuff, why should you have to endure the negative feelings vs. the normal healthy adults?

[/quote]

MIL doesn't give a crap about seeing OP; her interest is in being one of the very first people to see the baby, and most specifically, being able to see the baby at the same time as OP's mother.[/quote]

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