Reply to Besides sex, what are the most important things you do to improve your marriage?

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Reply to "Besides sex, what are the most important things you do to improve your marriage?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Guy here.  Here's what I do:

- Talk to her every day even if its just about how the day went.
- Always fiscally responsible
- take on at least half of the household work such as picking up, dishes, laundry, mowing, etc.
- Play an active role in parenting.  Homework every night, swordfights, etc.
- Stay fit and attractive.
-Tell her how great she looks.[/quote]

Another guy here - we have 3 kids (teen/pre-teen) and this describes our household and my role in the household to a tee.  I also make 4-5x as DW does.  I've read books that has helped me to increase my EQ so I can truly be there for DW whenever she needs.  We always talk at some during the day and after the kids are in bed.  I plan date nights and our adult-only vacations (we jointly plan the family vacations).

My problem is that it's about what I am doing for her and there really hasn't been reciprocation.  While the thread is what else besides sex, sex (and intimacy) is a very important part of equation for me, but she doesn't seem to get this and intimacy seems to be on her terms.  Struggling as to what I can do to change this dynamic around.[/quote]

We were actually told in religion class at our girls high school 'not to deny your husband sex' tvat 'sex was important to men and it's cruel to use sex as a weapon' etc etc. this was before we really knew much about sex (again - girls school) and it came from a married lady so it stuck with me.
Another girl piped up in another religion class when they were going over that 'don't give out the milk before you buy the cow bull-hockey' and said her parents were divorcing because of bad sex...

I also like sex for the intimacy and love and wouldn't/don't  like being denied by the husband either.

In any case perhaps it's time to teach more girls about sex when they are young too. My DD's would scream and cover their ears but once they are older I won't hesitate to tell them this. It was indeed good advice.

Ladies - there seem to be too many lame ones who take DH for granted out there.

You just have to tell her.[/quote]

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