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[quote=Anonymous]OP, be careful about not acknowledging your DD's gifts as well.  I'm objectively "smart", but my parents were simply not the kind to praise.  If anything, they were generally overly critical.  The result of that is 3 kids with across-the-board above average intelligence plus a host of other talents along with across-the-board low self-esteem (including 2 of us who have suffered eating disorders).

By a lot or measures I'm pretty successful.  I earn a fairly high salary in a cutting edge field and have a slew of degrees from prestigious schools...but I probably could have achieved more by now if I had the internal belief that I had something special to offer.  I'm coming to grips with that now, but even my Dad has acknowledged that he really made some mistakes not encouraging us more when we were kids.

Every person has gifts/talents that need to be nurtured.  If your child's gift is intelligence, something that is often prized higher than other traits, you may have to be a little bit more thoughtful in how you nurture it.  But if that's her gift, please don't denigrate it or act like it doesn't matter.  If she were a talented athlete or artist, you wouldn't ignore it or tell her that it doesn't matter.  Your job is to help her figure out how to make the most of what she has and to apply her capabilities to being the person she wants to be in this world.[/quote]

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