Reply to Surprised to find that my kid is the problem student, not sure how to improve

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[quote=Anonymous][quote]
Couple things:

1. The teacher's conduct is absolutely inappropriate. That doesn't mean your daughter ISN'T a problem student or that her behavior at school isn't an issue, but the teacher should NOT be posting about any of her students on social media, especially by name.

2. I would arrange a sit down with the principal to discuss the teacher's posting and how it will be handled and to request that your DD not be in that class.

3. At that meeting, you need to ask for an honest accounting of her behavior at school and what other teachers have reported in order for this to be coming up. There probably is something to it, your daughter is of course not going to know what it is because 13 year olds aren't very self aware.

4. You should not have shown your daughter the posting. That was terrible of you. [/quote]

Perfect response.

I would add, OP, that while you may feel you revealed somethings in your discussion with your child, that she may be manipulating you.  13 year olds do know how to do that.  Please don't overreact.

I taught school long ago.  In my classes and with my administration, respect for privacy was emphasized.  I cannot imagine posting or sending this type of comment.  Yes, in privacy with another teacher, you might make a negative comment--we are human.  But, to do this online is just plain inappropriate.

I'm not sure that teaches are taught today the same way that I was taught to be confidential.  I can remember parent conferences when one parent would try very hard to get me to say something negative about someone else's child.  I never bit.  But, I have volunteered in my kids' classrooms and had teachers make negative comments to me about other kids in their classes.  (One teacher in particular.) I was stunned.  I taught long before Facebook, and I fear that the Facebook culture has encouraged far too much sharing of personal information.

As for your DD. she may not be leveling with you.  I find it hard to believe that a teacher would single out one child like that for no reason--no matter how inappropriate the comment was.  DD may also be manipulating you to blame yourself.  Behavior in school is important.  That is not just the way you were raised, it is a fact.

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