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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]All AA is like that.  It is a crazy cult and it doesn't work.  Ask Google about it.[/quote]

+1 I predict this doesn't mix well with the atheist pov about reality - AA involves a LOT of magical thinking...kind of like alcoholism.  [/quote]

I will have to look into it more. What I've learned is he doesn't control how much he drinks. He doesn't currently have the self control to just stop drinking after 4 beers. He has to drink 12.

The pragmatist in me thinks it's completely unrealistic for someone our age to never drink again, with the weddings and vacations and social events we are attending all the time. He will be surrounded by it on a regular basis. I think one should focus more energy on retraining yourself to learn how to drink responsibly. Isn't that what they do in Europe? [/quote]

I think you need to read up on alcoholism, OP. Some people really CAN'T drink responsibly. It has to be all or nothing. They don't understand drinking just 1 beer. They don't even understand just drinking 4 beers (which is a lot, tbh). It's not about a lack of self control. It's a disease.

I agree that your fiance will have to learn how to be around alcohol socially at some point. Every restaurant that I've been to has offered me a wine list or a cocktail list. People have going away parties in bars. Weddings have champagne toasts. He doesn't have to drink at those events. For my husband (mentioned above as my lady wine night designated driver), his recovery has been more about teaching himself how to be at social events where there is alcohol and not drinking it. How to be okay in those situations without it. It was HARD. I suspect sometimes it is still hard. But he declines the drinks now. He just says, "No thanks, I'll have a club soda and lemon" or something similar. [/quote]

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