Reply to Family Relationships Judge and Jury: AMA

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Every time my mother comes to my house, she makes comments on things that need to be done (typically while sitting at the kitchen table and enjoying a cool beverage). Yesterday, she told me that she went down in my basement  and saw a lot of clutter and that the cat litter box needed scooping. I have a 4 year old, a 1 1/2 year old, and am heavily pregnant right now. How do I stop screaming at her? Its making me sweaty. Thanks in advance![/quote]

Well, you stop screaming at her by keeping your mouth closed instead of opening it wide. In the words of Daniel Tiger, "When you feel so mad that you want to roar, take a deep breath and count to four."

My advice:
1) Stop caring what she thinks/says about this matter. So your house isn't perfect. So what? Her house probably is/was wasn't perfect, either. 
2) Look her in the eye and say, "Mom, I'm really busy with the kids and this pregnancy, as you know. I know my house isn't perfect, but we manage. Please stop making these comments. Or, at the very least, help me get on top of some of these chores."
3) If she persists, stop inviting her over. Meet her at a park, or go to her house.

Good luck![/quote]

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