Reply to I'm on the verge of divorce, talk me down

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]You are a stressed out mom of a toddler.  It would be nice if your husband would help a bit more at home, but chaos and untidiness in the home right now go with the territory.  I often advocate divorce for situations posted in this forum, but your situation does NOT even come close.  If you can get a little outside help, do so.  If not, please just stop trying to have a "show house" so you can relax and enjoy your young family.  They grow really fast and you will have plenty of time to clean the kitchen counter when your little one is off at school in a few years.[/quote]

OP here. This is not about having a "show house". Some people hate messiness. Physical messiness creates mental messiness for some. I happen to be one of those people. Cleanliness creates calm for me. As the mother of a toddler i understand that my home won't be as clean as pre-baby, but I would like in the meantime for my spouse to step up and stop contributing to the mess in communal areas of our house.[/quote]

No, "some" people don't hate messiness. All people hate messiness. And all people think their spouses do annoying things. Right now, you feel like you are in a unique situation where you uniquely like clean and calm environments and your husband is uniquely messy. Both of these claims are false. If you replaced your husband, you would think the new one is messy too. And if he replaced you, your replacement would also dislike his mess. If you truly can't live like this and think being not in a relationship would be better for you, then yes, get a divorce. If you think that you are in a unique situation that can somehow be fixed by divorcing and remarrying, no, you're not. If you plan to remarry, what the whole thing will get you is a lot of pain, frustration, and wasted money all to get you into exactly the same situation as you are now.[/quote]

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