Reply to Single Mom - only one child & the future

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]You do have a family, but you are allowed to mourn what you thought you wanted.  Life doesn't always go the way people want.  If you still want to date, though, do so.  Maybe you meet someone, maybe you don't.  If you do, maybe you have another child, maybe you don't.

For the moment, focus on your child and providing the best life you can for the two of you.[/quote]

+1.  This is beautiful advice, PP.  So true to focus on the child, but it doesn't mean one can't lament that it didn't turn out the way OP wanted.  FWIW, I am happily married, have a couple of kids, and it's not as easy or wonderful as it may look, and also, btw, what I envisioned for myself either, as I gave up a huge career that I loved for my current situation.  I did have to mourn that vision of the version of my life that I gave up.

OP, I have a wonderful friend who was engaged and it didn't work out.  At 47 she was in NYC for business on 9/11 and watched the twin towers fall.  She was stuck in NY for a week or two, knowing nobody, and did a lot of reflecting about how she hated her (amazing) job/career and had nobody, nothing, had not made a difference in the world, and how had it come to this.  She ended up adopting her DD, (who is now 13) and shortly thereafter, retiring.  Her life is hard but really rewarding.  She doesn't date.  She focuses on her blessings, and to the best of her ability, she made her own luck.

Now as another tangent, just want to say that "it's not over until it's over."  Meaning, you don't know what will happen in your life--my mom is 90, and two years ago a wonderful handsome man proposed to her.  LOL

Good luck, OP, and just keep the long view in mind.[/quote]

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