Reply to How to get a child to stick to a sport

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I hate to break it to you, but wanting to win comes from within. I drove my dad bananas - he would fuss at me and tell me I was just partcipating and not competing. I sure was. I have never cared what other people are doing, and Sports was no exception. That isn't something you can teach, sorry.[/quote]

+1. I played on a varsity sport in high school and never really cared if we won. I loved practicing and the activity. I'm not a competitive adult.

My son sounds like your daughter. I think it's great that he's tried a bunch of things. DH is super annoyed that he doesn't put forth 100% effort on the fields like he does when he's running with friends for fun. It's really about he doesn't care about the competition and winning.  This has actually caused arguments between us about the line between encouraging and pushing too hard. [/quote]

+100

I come from a long line of super-competitive people.  My brother, sister and I competed at EVERYTHING!  Board games, sports, etc.  but we found it fun.

My older son (now 10) cannot stand to lose.  He gives 120% in a game and it comes out in anger and/or tears if he loses.  I marvel at teammates that are smiling and laughing post-tournament finals while my kid throws his 2nd place medal in the trash.  Younger son is a bit better about leaving it on the field.

Many coaches have told me passion like my firstborn's cannot be taught.  He's the same way with grades.  I work with him to find ways to channel the intensity.

People would never know by looking at him--sweet, easy-going kid with lots of friends that will totally console a teammate after a missed shot, etc., but doesn't afford himself the same sympathies.

I do think it's innate.[/quote]

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