Reply to MIL's erratic generosity making it hard to plan

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP back. Yes, everyone is right that this is a DH problem. At the same time it just flummoxes me that MIL is not more organized and goal oriented about what she wants to accomplish with her money. (Which if all she wanted was to keep it, would be fine with me.)

I think what I have to do is open up the 529 and start contributing myself, and every time DH proposes an extra joint expense like a vacation tell him we can't afford it. I will also have a conversation with MIL and give her the 529 information and leave it up to her if she wants to contribute. I think I also have to spell out for her what college expenses realistically are these days because she has no idea!  [/quote]

You are the one who is worse than your DH. You are counting on her money TOO. Wow, you are a piece of work.[/quote]

Calm down. MIL has said repeatedly that she wants to help pay for college, and DH has said she does too. I am not going to ask her for any money - I am just going to tell her what my plan and goal is, and she can contribute if she wants to. I honestly don't care if she doesn't and would actually prefer at this point if she never gave us anything. The dilemma is DH believing that we don't have to save anything. I somehow have to get *him* to focus, and it would be much easier if MIL just told us what she planned to do. If she wants to spend all money on herself that is 100% fine with me. [/quote]

She doesn't need to know your plan.  You save independently and if she is interested, she can ask, then you tell her.  Its not ok with you if she spends the money on herself as you are also expecting a large payout for college and other things.  You are just like your husband, if not worse.[/quote]

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