Reply to Separation/divorce and mother's day

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My divorce has been on the works for years (literally, long story).. and we will likely be moving to our separate houses on June/July, but no matter how difficult things were, we always celebrated our birthdays together, as well as major holidays, including Mother's Day and Father's Day.
Today DH (or XH) told me I should make my own plans. For other separated/divorced moms/dads out there... do you spend mother and father's day together? I know DD wants to get my a present like she does every year with dad (I guess that's how the conversation surfaced today) and I don't know how to help. She looked heartbroken today.
I am sure I can come up with a plan (no family in the area) but curious about what others do.[/quote]

We have celebrated them separately always (since the initial separation when DC was an infant). Most divorced families I know do it this way, but it's great if families can do holidays together in a positive way.

A recently divorced friend opted out of Mother's Day. It was a bit shocking, but she traded it for an extra weekend of her choosing. In a way, this is smart as Mother's Day often means crowded, overpriced brunches. Instead, she has booked herself an at home full-body massage.

The only thing I dislike about separate celebrations is that DC doesn't see my dad on Father's Day or my ex's mom on Mother's Day. I can't say how ex handles this, but his mom has politely turned down all invites to join us for brunch. I get it. My ex always thinks she is taking "my side" when really she has just backed me only when he has been absolutely ridiculous. I make sure she sees DC on her (grandma's) birthday which is not written into our agreement.  [/quote]

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