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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I could be projecting my insecurity, or else I didn't give a good example of what she's like. I'm not saying she's a bad person or intentionally trying to be judgey, but I am aware of her judgemental side. I also find that older, larger, louder, more domineering people are hard to deal with because they run roughshod over people.  I ask her about herself but I feel overwhelmed by her conversational style and her take charge attitude.  I feel like I have no say in the routine when they come over.  It's like the comment someone made once of someone opening a bounce house inside your house.[/quote]

What are you, 12 years old? You're afraid of "older, larger, louder" people? You're overwhelmed by assertive people? I guarantee, you're the one with issues, projecting your fears and insecurities. Stop projecting onto others and look inward. You have some work to do to grow up all the way.[/quote]

+1. No one else runs my show. My MIL tries, but I redirect and--if absolutely necessary--directly shut her down. She keeps trying, and I keep setting boundaries. It's not always easy or comfortable, but I do what I have to do.[/quote]

See, you are one of those "older larger louder" people.  OP, you need to become one too.[/quote]

Actually, no. I'm an introvert. But after years of allowing myself to be controlled, I realized that I was in charge of me. So I handle my business instead of acting like a doormat.[/quote]

Can you give examples of 'how you handle your business' so the rest of us can learn![/quote]

MIL: Well, it's only 10 a.m.; I'm sure you can stay for lunch at 1.
Me: I'm sorry, Mary, like I said yesterday, we need to leave at 10:30 to make it home in time for Larla's nap. But thanks for a great visit!
MIL: Larla can have a soda just this one time!
Me: No, she may not; but I'm sure she'd like one of your wonderful chocolate chip cookies after dinner.
[/quote]

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