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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Op Here. I was in individual counseling for a few months prior to begging him to go to counseling with me. We went 5 times and the counselor basically told him that he needed to say what he needed from me in order to feel secure and trust me. He couldn't exactly pinpoint what he needed besides me going out with my friends. Which I did. That still didn't help.

We have three kids. They know that "Mom and Dad are going through a tough time" and they have expressed their fears of us getting a divorce. It breaks my  heart because I would rather stay in a shitty marriage to make my kids happy if that's what I need to do.

I cheated because he's gone 5 months out of the year and we lost connection. It was my fault. I know this. [/quote]

From this outside perspective - your husband sounds like an asshole who is more interested in making you miserable, even if it makes everyone miserable.  He would rather everyone be unhappy, including your children, so long as it continues to punish you.

No wonder you strayed.

You made a mistake, one many people make, especially when there is an absence in the marriage.  He can see you as a human worthy of love and a second chance, but he doesn't and probably will never?  I am of the same belief as you - that children deserve an intact home if at all possible.  But I would probably give counselling one last shot and make it clear he truly forgives you or cut the cord on this.[/quote]

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