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[quote=Anonymous]OK, wow, I looked up Selective Mutism and learned quite a bit as it relates to social anxiety. I am now going to do what you don't like your relatives to do:  suggest something!

But I'm not doing it in front of your daughter, so here goes:

There is a study that, if you haven't heard of, you might see if your daughter qualifies to participate in. I know a child who had a milder form of selective mutism (spoke fluently at home, but only to parents when outside the home) who made huge leaps after participating in the study.  As in, one year later, I don't recognize the child sometimes as the behavior is so different, so relaxed, and the child speaks to people.  I still see some anxiety/shyness but nothing like before.  I still am amazed by the difference the intervention made.   The study is at the the University of Maryland.

I'm also the director of a preschool and received information from University of Maryland about that study via email as they want to get enough children for their study (plus, it helps children in the process, which is a win-win).

Here's what I received in my email:

Drs. Andrea Chronis-Tuscano and Kenneth Rubin are conducting a National Institute of Mental Health-funded study examining two early intervention programs for shy children ages 45 to 64 months (3.5-5 years 4 months) and their parents. Research has found that both programs are effective in helping children feel less nervous in social situations. We are asking for assistance in the area surrounding the university to help us in distributing information about this intervention study opportunity to families of preschoolers who may be very shy. More information about our study and staff can be found on our website, at: https://sites.google.com/site/umdlittleturtles/umd-preschool-shyness-study

Good luck, OP.  I know this is hard.  
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