Reply to An immigrants musings on the SAHM vs working mom debate

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]This doesn't seem like musings.  It's you starting another lame WOHM vs SAHM debate.  Good for you that you love working out of the home, that you don't envy SAHMs and that you think working is the only way to contribute to society.  Clap, clap.

My parents were immigrants and they love America as do I.  It's because we have the CHOICE.  No one here is forced to stay veiled and at home. If we can afford to stay at home we have that choice.

You don't have to put down a SAHM by thinking she isn't a contributing member to society.  Your missing the point of the freedoms we have.  Rather than thinking you are doing some great service to the world by earning a paycheck you're missing that you have that choice to do so or to not do so.

[b]Working out of the home is not the privilege. The CHOICE is the privilege.[/b]

[/quote]

Yup, right here is the entire "argument," such as it is. No other words necessary. [/quote]

OP here. I disagree. Being able to provide for yourself, open a bank account in your name, being able to rent an apartment without needing a father or a husband to co-sign it for you. THAT is a privilege. Being able to go to a safe, clean office where you are respected and treated as an equal and allowed to voice your opinion and develop as a professional. That is a privilege.

In America, a woman does not HAVE to work. If she doesn't want a very UMC life, she can live comfortably on her husband's middle class salary sans the private school and the lululemon yoga pants. That she can do so if she WANTS to, that is a privilege.

Women historically were literally not allowed to work outside of the home. Now that we can, it is a privilege. To think otherwise is to be ungrateful. [/quote]

Actually, as another poster so succinctly put it:  the [b]choice [/b]to either WOH or SAHM is the privilege.  I'm grateful every single day to have this choice and to do what's right for my family.  Perhaps our needs will change in the future and I'll make a different choice.  But for now, I certainly don't need someone who looks at our lives through the lens of her own patriarchal homeland to tell other women how to best live their lives.  Here in America, we have husbands who are equal partners and who don't beat us or keep us locked up at home.  And men who think they can get away with that are hauled off to jail, where they belong.  My husband is my biggest supporter - whether I choose to WOH or SAH with our kids - and the husbands of my friends and family members are the same way.

I will be forever grateful to have been born in this country where men don't have their thumb on me at all times, and I'm free to choose how to live my life.  I'm glad you recognize how lucky you are to now be living in a country in which we all have these freedoms.  I can't imagine living in a patriarchal society such as the one you came from.[/quote]

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