Reply to Should I talk to the adult leader?

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Reply to "Should I talk to the adult leader?"

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[quote=Anonymous]I'm an adult and work with 6th graders in a volunteer role.  I'm sorry but if a kid is taking up my time with whining and doesn't stop when I've tried being nice or placating then I too might say that I don't care.  You also don't know the context of the "I don't care" comment.  Honestly the 9th grader does not care, and this is really feedback that young people need to get.  You have no idea of the context of the comment either.  Kids don't always give you the whole picture.  I've found that when talking to these kids about their complaints about their parents or teachers they are very one sided.

Many kids are so coddled that they have no concept of how they come across in a group and how annoying they can be to the ENTIRE group.  I see it all the time and it's always the same type of kid, usually the only child (but not always) has no idea what it's like to not have everything go their way.  They have no compulsion about moping, taking the whole group time up for their minor complaints.  It's a tough balance managing kids, you want feedback but you don't want to waste time with inconsequential trivial complaints.

Honestly, if I were you, I would go and speak to the youth leader that told your child he did not care.  You need to assess if the youth leader was being callous, and give him that feedback, or if your child is being a whiner and then address that with your son.

Either way this is a fantastic teaching moment for your son.  This may lead to him learning how to advocate for himself or to attenuate whining behavior or how to deal with disappointment.

This idea of switching is not a good one, he needs to face a little adversity, switching is just going to teach him to punk out and not challenge himself or authority.  [/quote]

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