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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I was a nanny for a few years, so dirty diapers don't bother me ( nanny for newborn twins and then a spina bifida kid). Once again, I'm more concerned of the we nicely said no and she disregarded it anyhow.[/quote]

Well, it sounds like everyone has accepted that "that's just the way she is" so it's on you to just be who you are, OP.

Being gracious about it is always the way to go---even when saying no. I wouldn't say anything about "being best for our family" because that just draws a line. It's mean, too. Off loading it discretely and allowing the chips to fall where they may might be the best route here. Rather than try to change her, just do you. Politely.

Trading it for house cleaning sounds like a plan.

I had to deal with this issue with my own mother, who'd buy things she thought appropriate no matter input I provided. In the end, it came down to "a gift is a gift, Mom." I'd thank her, of course, then return it and use the money for something else. She came on board rather quickly. I think in my case it was something like a baby mini bath tub. I didn't use it, but surely appreciated the wipes I'd traded it in for. I thanked her for those as well!

There are a lot of ways to defend boundaries, OP. You don't need to confront or lay down the law. Simply carry on and do what's best for you and yours.

GL. I look forward to reading future posts about this MIL.
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