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[quote=Anonymous]OP Sometimes you can try and try but it just does not work. Do not say anything to your mom and really no need to say anything to your sister. Just get"very busy" -- so busy you just do not have time for her. Let some time pass. I miss my brother terribly, but what I miss is the thing I thought he was, not who he really is. He waits until my guard is down then lands the punch (verbally) then I have to go off and recover in my tears. It is just not worth it. My mother, who allowed this behavior, is of course no help. Strengthen your relationships with others outside the family and the next thing you know a few years will pass. The first one is the hardest, because you keep thinking -- shouldn't I be there for this Holiday? But it is not a Holiday for you if you are terribly unhappy. It took me looking at the Holiday pictures of myself looking so sad to finally stand up for myself -- by not being there. Who knows. maybe time will heal the rift between the two of you.[/quote]

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