Reply to Do you have an ADHD or aspergers child in a mainstream private?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Thank you, 8:40 and 11:27.

Our HFA DD is in a mainstream public and doing well with minimal in school supports. She is an excellent student, focused and never disruptive.  She has a friend here and there but has difficulty socially.

We have been investigating private schools for MS because the public MS we are zoned for is large and, like many kids, she would probably do better in a smaller school. But when we talk to mainstream privates about admissions, it is very discouraging. Most are unable or unwilling to see past her diagnosis, perhaps suffering from the same prejudices as the PP at 7:57. Mostly, I think they have plenty of applicants and so can't be bothered with a kid that might make them think outside their box. 
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I wish you good luck in finding a school that will be a good fit for your child. [/quote]

First, look at privates in MD and VA.  They do not have the built in flow of applicants based on the same degree of negative perceptions of the local publics as DC schools in the middle years.  Second, I just need to ask - how mainstream can your DD appear in an interview, and are you seeking specific supports?  If you need specific socially related supports, they need to be worked out up front then it's a "no go," then you need to disclose and discuss with the school. If the range of support needed may be what a school would do for a NT girl described as "shy with new kids," and your DD can pull off a reasonable interview, you might consider the route we took - we explained our child totally and honestly, but omitted any diagnosis.  Our DC thrived in a supportive but slightly more strictured small private.  DC was never part of the "in crowd"'of socially fast affluent kids, but DC graduated with several very good friends that had their own group, and as each year of high school went by the social group grew. Now, before we got to middle school there were no noticeable signs.  Obviously, if a child perseverates in an interview on an odd topic or has clearly noticeable styms, this won't work -- yet.  Good luck to you and others above in your situation.  Our DC is now in college and we have several friends who had similar children who have already graduated and have jobs.  As young adults, these kids lives aren't problem free but whose is anyone? Just stay on top of doing the best you can and odds are that your HFA/Aspie kid will turn out better than you imagined before you even had a diagnosis. 
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