Reply to Husband unemployed and not applying for jobs. How to manage my feelings?

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[quote=Anonymous]Hi All, 
I am 36 and my boyfriend is 31. We have been together since 5 years. We met when we were working in the same company.

The situation was difficult at work for both of us. I did everything to find an another job. I found one. When i left he pushed them to get fired. He is now 5 months unemployed. We tried to have a baby with the FIV last year. It was a long jorney, it is now 3 years we are trying. The problems come from him. He smokes marjuana and he has never stopped, just 3 months before the FIV, even if every doctor told him to stop, because it does not help to have babies naturally and it increases his bad conditions. This year we should do the transfer of the blastocite, last year we could not do it because of with my new job. i could not be pregnant, at least for the first 3 months.

I am writing you because I am tired. i want to dump him even if i loves him. He spends his days smoking watching movies, playing with the playstation, not looking for a job at all. There are two months and more the government does not pay him the unemployment. I paid the rent, he uses our cards as he does not have money, he will give me them back. It is not question of money, if i would see that he is looking for a job, that he is thinking to our future family...nothing...he smokes ...movies, playstation..I don't want to talk with somebody knowing that he smoked...to look at his red ayes...

On top I still would like to try to have a baby naturally, his answer: the analysis results when i was not smoking were the same than when i was smoking...

what a stupid answer!!!!!!!!!and so??? at least try, if all the doctors are telling you something...try t do it!!!

I don't want to go back home, i feel so sad..I am so sad. I tried to talk with him. His stupid answers: i do what i want, i don' t care...bla bla...an adolescent..

what to do? am i exaggerating? I paid for the FIV, for him we could wait as we did not have money... I saved alone all the money for it. I am 36 i cannot wait...

sometimes i feel to do all wrong..pleae help me. If you talk with him, i am the one exagerating..

thanks![/quote]

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