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[quote=Anonymous]In my teens and 20s, I really wanted to be in a romantic relationship. My parents had a terrible marriage; one grandmother was twice divorced, twice widowed; the other was married to a man who was abusive to everyone. So I didn't have good role models for relationships. I had two okay teenage boyfriends, but I was not crazy about either of them. In college, I met a guy I was crazy about and we fell into a not-quite FWB situation. We never slept together, but there was plenty of frantic making out. Meanwhile, we casually dated other people. I fell in love for the first time after my therapist insisted I get out of that situation. It was out of the frying pan and into the fire. College bf was a classic narcissist. I didn't get free of him until I got pregnant.

I was in another complicated non-sexual relationship in my early to mid twenties. It wasn't miserable, though. We just ultimately couldn't come up with a way to build a life together that ticked all our individual boxes.

In my late 20s through very early 30s, I was in a terrible marriage and once I got out of that, I felt pretty much done with love and marriage. I had a purely sexual relationship with a very long term partner that ended amicably. I followed that with a couple years of (quasi)celibacy (battery powered relief was a major feature). It was lovely. I founded great platonic friendships and figured myself out.

At 39, I met a man when I was least interested in anything meaningful. We started as friends and I was pretty sure we'd stay just friends. We're getting married in 9 mos. all the things I'd unsuccessfully sought in a relationship, we've achieved. He's a lover, provider, friend, companion, and protector. I know some people bemoan meeting their soulmate late in life, but the truth is I wasn't ready for him before we met.[/quote]

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