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Reply to "Anyone successfully changed a spouses mind?"

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[quote=Anonymous]Op, it's not a healthy friendship between the two of you.

You say you are doing nothing but letting her vent, but in this situation that IS doing something, it IS supporting her current situation.  She needs to not have you to vent to--think about the word "vent" for a moment.  With no where to vent, something actually happens--there is movement of some kind.  Yes it may be an explosion but the point is, it stops the hamster wheel situation.

You may not think you are getting anything out of this, but you are--you get to be her special friend, her most loyal friend, the one who will stay with her and listen to all her BS.  You think that without you, she'll have no one, be alone, therefore you are necessary--you are important.

So she makes you feel important, and that's why you listen to her.

And you ARE important, but important for the wrong reasons--important for keeping her in her own status quo.  You're lack of opinions and your listening gives her hope.

You are not helping, OP.  I say either stay away, or engage her honestly, as a good friend should do, and tell her if you think she should get out.

And if she blows you off for you being honest, then you know what you already suspect--that she and you were never really good friends.[/quote]

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