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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]How about unconditional love and support? The same brand you expect and accept.[/quote]

OP here. I do love my brother unconditionally and am not setting out to "improve" him. Both our parents died prematurely so at the forefront of my mind is the idea that genetics are stacked against my brother and me. Maybe because of that I keep myself in shape and eat healthily. But I don't foist my lifestyle on others. I just don't want to lose my brother at an early age. I get that maybe his attitude is different and wanting to enjoy the pleasure of the moment, especially as, unlike me, he hasn't kids or a partner to consider, but he used to be really active, especially in cycling and snowboarding. He doesn't do either now. I know that saying something could be counterproductive but it's really hard to sit back and watch someone you love wolf down that third or fourth slice of cake. It's like he's an addict, but to food rather than to drugs, alcohol or tobacco. [/quote]

I really doubt your brother wants to die prematurely either.  His attitude is not different -- his behavior is different.  Your "saying something" about his eating more cake serves only to shame his behavior.

Actually, you do foist your lifestyle on others.  You bought him a Fitbit, you want to "say something" to magically change him back into an active person to guarantee that he won't die prematurely.  What you really need to deal with are your fears.[/quote]

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