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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]You put the toddler to nap on grandma's bed and sit and have the dessert.

No way did I let my toddler hold me hostage on holidays.  And it's only lunchtime -- did you see these people yesterday or on Christmas eve? If not, you bugging out around noon is rude. It's your child's family. [/quote]

+1[/quote]

Not every toddler will just conk out on any available bed.

I would be very clear that you are leaving at x time due to naps well in advance.

The bigger issue is that [b]she screamed at you[/b] and DH said nothing. I would have packed up the kids and walked out right then--and DH had darned well better come too.[/quote]

There is objective screaming and then there's a tone of voice that people don't like and [b]label[/b] screaming even if third parties barely register it as a raise in voice level. Maybe OP's DH heard it and didn't think it sounded like screaming so he didn't intervene.

Turns out both my mother and my future MIL are yellers. They yell when they are happy. They yell when they are mad. I don't think a shrill tone would cause either of us to take notice. Our mothers are too lady like to curse or throw pie at us if we tried to duck out early, but they do use nasty tones, sarcastic speech patterns, and cutting words sometimes. I think we both regard each other as adults able to hold our own if the other's mom tried to verbally intimidate us. [/quote]

You are right.  MIL talks like this fairly often and everyone but her immediate family is horrified by it.  My elderly next door neighbor told me she is scared of her.  She primarily does it to her husband.  I think it is not ok and her husband or children need to tell her that.  I am mostly frustrated that DH didn't say anything.  He says he doesn't hear it anymore which I think is a BS excuse. He also says there is no point because she will never change.  Everyone seems afraid of her which I don't get.[/quote]

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