Reply to How long do I need put up with laziness?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]How many of the people harshing here on OP have spouses with jobs of wildly different and lower professional stature? And how many can relate to OPs situation, where she thought she was marrying one type of person and he turned out to be a different type?

OP, is he really lazy, or does he just work in these unskilled/less skilled jobs but still works hard? Does he work full-time? Are his computer skills outdated by now? I'm assuming the waiter jobs aren't at high-end places where good service can be complex and remunerative?[/quote]

+1 that there are the right questions to ask.  My DH, who I met in college and was working when we married, has a JD and a Master's and is currently a SAHD that doesn't even keep up with the house or kids all that well but knows a LOT about video games and his hobbies.  He is only a SAHD because he lost his job and didn't even try to find anything else.

I work 60-80 hours a week and have to nag him to do even the most basic thing.  But for the kids, I would be out in a moment, not because he doesn't fulfill some SES need but because he is not truly a partner.  Instead of the motivated person I married, he is horribly lazy and selfish. It just isn't clear from your post whether that is true of your DH or not...[/quote]

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