Reply to Feelings of regret for waiting too long to TTC, now dealing with infertility

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[quote=Anonymous]i have felt a lot of disappointment, but not really regret/blame.  its hard to play the 'if only i had..." game because you only see the potential good outcomes but not the potential bad ones.  i met my husband later, (at age 34) and i'm glad i didn't have children with anyone else.  if i hadn't 'waited' until we met, i would have really missed out.  i know that's not the case with OP, but  perhaps you and your child having had a lot of bonding time together early on has strengthened your relationship with him and with your spouse.  Also, i've had a lot of opportunities that my friends who had kids early on didn't experience: getting higher education, moving to a city i love, getting better career options, international travel, plus spending more time bonding with my niece.  some of my friends say they wish they had taken more time before starting so they'd be more financially secure now...so its a catch 22, frankly.  when i feel so down about it i try to focus on what i DO have, an awesome partner, a great life, a close extended family.  that's a lot more than many people have. i know it can be small comfort in the face of unexpected disappointment, but its comfort nonetheless.  all that said, i do tell my friends in their 30's to be aware of the good possibility of a fertility struggle that could be coming, because i think the hardest part is being unpleasantly surprised by that-i certainly never thought it would happen to me, especially after the slew of unhelpful articles about how women were overreacting and could wait well into their thirties.  good luck to you on all your life's journeys.             [/quote]

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