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[quote=Anonymous]Timely question, OP.   My kid is technically Muslim, but we don't really practice anything.   Very agnostic parents, one from a Muslim background and one from a Christian background.  My son tells people he doesn't believe in God.  We've told him that we as a family focus on kindness in our family and not religion, but that he can do what he wants as he gets older.

For two years, one Christian girl kept telling my son he was going to hell, and that the devil would get him.  And that brought him home in tears several times (k and 1st grade).

Now, he's got two extremely conservative Muslim kids in his class trying to get him to join them in prayer at school.  This one is a little more tricky.  Technically, he doesn't have to start fasting or praying until he hits puberty, and he's only 7.   While the Christian girl wasn't proselytizing, but was just repeating what she has been told at home and at church, these two kids "are" trying to bring my son back into the "legitimacy" of Islam because he has one non-believing parent (that they know of).  This is an obligation under Islam.   I've told him prayer is not considered obligatory until puberty.

As far as dealing with kids at school.  I've given him simple, pat answers that he can respond with, like the fact prayer isn't obligatory for him yet.  And then I've given him a deeper explanation.

I've told him different families practice religion in different ways, and that not all Muslims do the same thing and not all Christians do the same thing, either.  I've told him that we are respectful of people's religious differences and we expect them to be respectful of ours.  And that the true exemplification of a person's religion is how they treat others. So if a Muslim kid is mean to others, that doesn't speak well for Islam.  Or if a Christian kid is mean to others, that doesn't speak well for Christianity.  Or if you, son, are mean to others, that doesn't speak well for being agnostic.    Let me see you live your beliefs rather than hear you preach your beliefs.

In ongoing conversations we have about religion and spirituality, we talk about how these beliefs can be a vehicle for kindness and helpfulness, and often are.  But if people aren't using their beliefs to be kind and helpful, if they are using their beliefs to isolate others or condemn them or think less of them, then they aren't doing their religion (or other belief system) right.

I hope this is a way that lets him respect someone's religion or lack thereof, and instead look at actions.  I hope this helps him understand differences are fine as long as we are kind.  And I hope it gives him a foundation of kindness that carries him into whatever belief system he may choose as he grows up.

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