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[quote=Anonymous]OP here. I honestly don't know what my sister in laws' issues are. From my perspective, I didn't see a ton of issues but then again I was occupied with losing my parents (my mother died from cancer when I was engaged and my father died shortly before we had gotten married, so my in laws were kind of a fresh breeze. They were funny, witty, and just a light bunch. I didn't see any strife or anything that would make it seem like the kids hate or want to estrange themselves from their father. I have three kids (4, 2 and 6 mo.) and got pregnant shortly after getting married, so I went from grieving my parents to being in the throes of small children and working. Like I said, during all of this, my in laws were funny and nice and light and breezy. I liked all of them.

The divorce was strange and sudden, but everyone seemed fine with it. It was sort of a joking thing amongst the siblings. The siblings, including my DH, are kind of seemed to focus on their own families and had the view that their parents' issues were their own to sort out.

I actually would love for my FIL to go into assisted living, but his affairs are a cluster. He doesn't have a power of attorney, we are sorting out wait lists, etc. There is a shit ton of just administrative crap work that DH is handling to sort his FIL's affairs. This is another component to the mess we are stuck handling.

I actually had a long talk with DH about this. He opened up that his family has a hard time talking about difficult things and he hasn't made it clear how bad things are to his sisters. He was honest about the stroke but made it sound like his dad would bounce back without a long road of recovery -- his own denial admittedly. I get it and told him that everyone needs to face reality and figure out how we deal with the world we live in now. He agreed and is going to write his sisters an email laying everything out and asking for their help in managing things.

I slept soundly for the first time in a month. I just feel good knowing that we aren't stuck holding things up alone.[/quote]

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