Reply to Has anyone here allowed the state to take gaurdianship over a parent or sibling?

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Reply to "Has anyone here allowed the state to take gaurdianship over a parent or sibling?"

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[quote=Anonymous]OP, I feel for you so much.  I was in a care taking role for both of my parents before they died, but I had to maintain much more physical and emotional distance from my mom, who was bipolar and had rage issues and was, simply put, an emotional vampire.  But I loved her and I wanted to do what I coukd while preserving my emotional health.  And for practical reasons, her state was also much better than VA for benefits, so I did it all from 300 miles away, which was necessary for my sanity but also took a huge toll, especially at the end where she really needed an advocate in person.

Maybe states have different laws but in my case, I was never obligated to her financially.  I think PA is the only state with filial responsibility laws. But I coordinated her care, kept on top of her eligibility paperwork, etc.

I'll say this: I'm I me self grateful in the end that I had control medically and could make decisions that allowed her to have a comfortable, peaceful death.  Without that legal power, she wouldhave lingered and suffered much more.

That said, your DH's own self care must come first, and yours. My brother had taken on a Much more active care taking role for my mom despite the fact that he also was bipolar and had an unstable wife; he bought a duplex house and let her live with them.  He thought I was pretty selfish sometimes to have so many miles between us.  But he died by suicide.  So if you just think it's too, too much, it's really okay for your DH to save himself first.  [/quote]

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