Reply to Financial support "vs." independence

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[quote=Anonymous]My parents have helped us at various points.  Mostly, they just give occasional checks and make it clear they have given the same to my siblings.  They don't care what we use it for, but I try to make a point to tell them.  They always say that they would rather see us enjoy the money than to leave us a big pile when they die.  Its not really life altering money, but I did buy a new washer and dryer with the last one so it is very helpful and appreciated.  They pay for dinner's out as well.  They do let us know that once they retire and are on a fixed income these bonus checks will stop or at least be much less frequent and for lower amounts.

My Inlaws, on the other hand, never give or offer a dime.  Seldom even give gifts.  Don't pay for dinners, etc.  My husband stopped accepting any form of money from them when he was 20 because everything came at a cost.  They controlled everything- like when his parents paid for some of his college his father had to approve of his course selections. Not just, your going to take math this semester.  But- you are going to take this math class with this teacher at this time.  Insane.

It took my DH a long time to accept that my parents gave without strings attached.[/quote]

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