Reply to awful night with bf- any tips?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous] As someone who loves me, I expect him to relish the fact that he gets to see me at the end of the day and he should not want to wait to hang out with me and talk to me and tell me about his day.[/quote]

To me this sounds exhausting.

You can't tell people how they should feel when they love you. [/quote]

+1.

OP, I'm an extreme extrovert married to a mild-to-moderate introvert.

Very happily married, in fact!

But the [b]absolute fucking worst thing you can possibly do[/b] is get it in your head that "because I express love/happiness/affection in X way, he/she will express it in X way too, and if they express something different, I'll just assume it means to them whatever it would mean if [i]I[/i] expressed it."

This is so fucking dumb that there's even a name for it -- the Mirror Imaging Fallacy. Emphasis on "Fallacy".

You have two options.

You can find someone who reacts to everything in a relationship the same way you do, which you might find someone who matches you more but good fucking luck finding someone who matches you perfectly...

...or you can learn to take him as he is and take his emotions/reactions/expressions *on their own terms* rather than through the lens of *your* relationship/romantic logic, which is [b]not universal[/b], it's [i]just the way that you personally prefer to do things[/i].

Pick one.[/quote]

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